|$||70.5M||Star Trek Into Darkness|
|$||35.1M||Iron Man 3|
|$||23.4M||The Great Gatsby (2013)|
|$||3.1M||Pain & Gain|
|As of May 19, 2013|
There are a minimum of three scenes in I Love You Phillip Morris that will cause one of two reactions; intense vomiting/reflux, or piercing laughter. My top two choices for most disgusting scene in this film are Steven and Debbie’s love making, and Steven’s anal humping scene with a buff and tattooed gentleman (and his anus uses that term loosely). Both of these scenes, at least for me, are proof positive that shock and awe is not always impressive or effective. I am unleashing a guerrilla war against this picture’s vulgarity.
When I watched the sex scene between Carrey and Mann I cringed the whole time. He jackhammers her like a construction worker devouring a concrete sidewalk and then pauses to discuss his birth mother’s identity. When she becomes temporarily distracted, he reminds her that he hasn’t come yet and then proceeds to relentlessly bang her vagina. I think this visual, combined with the bed slamming into the wall has permanently grossed me out. I am not some Victorian prude, I am as raunchy as the next person, but this is beyond sordid.
The next candidate, (again, this is my opinion) is Steven’s sex scene with one of his male lovers. After the initial drama wears off from the birth mother and marital sex scenes, we discover our leading man is homosexual. No problem so far. Except when we are treated (or tricked?) to a visual of Carrey virtually ass-raping a brawny man. The icing on the cock, I mean cake, comes when he announces he is coming inside of this man’s anus. Color me shocked, spank me, and call me Sally. Actually, on second thought, don’t do any of those things.
The remainder of the film is about Steven’s criminal activities. Despite being the ultimate con man he is imprisoned. This is where he meets and greets (if you know what I mean) the love of his life, Phillip Morris (Ewan McGregor). I like Ewan, correction, I used to like Ewan. Together they establish grandiose dreams of committing fraud and of making love while standing up (sounds juicier this way). Obi Wan also manages to show his new apprentice his light saber. Too far?
If you have a “creative” sense of humor then I Love You Phillip Morris is for you. If you are easily offended or simply turned off by too much graphic sexuality too soon I recommend you stay away. If only the naked man in my second most ruinous scene was Timothy Olyphant that would have changed everything. Ready to vomit yet? Me too.
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