| $ | 103.0M | Marvel's The Avengers |
| $ | 29.6M | Dark Shadows |
| $ | 5.8M | Think Like a Man |
| $ | 4.5M | The Hunger Games |
| $ | 4.1M | The Lucky One |
| As of May 14, 2012 | ||
A man has broken the world record for fist pumping buy pumping for 17 hours. My god what an achievement, but we are overlooking how raw his penis must be. The President of Yahoo has been forced to resign because he made an inflated claim on his resume. Meanwhile, in other news, Barak Obama ate dog. Robert Pattinson is 27 going on 17, good for you RSchmuck, I mean RPutz. Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer an item again? Is Jessica Simpson's body still a wonderland? Yes, it's just we are wondering why her territory doubled in size. Is Jay-Z acting like a wild bachelor on the prowl? With a name like Jay-Z I don't think any of us really care. Drake is romancing two cougars? Man, dude's a zookeeper. Does Casper Smart enjoy his five minutes of fame? Is that all he lasts for? Lightweight. Rihanna was recently hospitalized for too much partying. It's ok though, let's keep the focus on Lindsay Lohan, she's white after all. Christina Aguilera is quitting The Voice. John Travolta is not gay, he just like's dudes.
Mariah and Nick renew their vows in Paris? I bet he showed her the Eiffel Tower. Truth be told, it might have been more like the leaning tower of Pisa. Gwyneth Paltrow has post partum depression. Me too, but it has been quite a while since I was in the womb. Kim K and Lindsay Lohan will attend the White House Correspondent's Dinner. I guess they wanted to see who has the best lines, and I'm not talking about comedy. Jessica Simpson has a baby shower? What is it like 2 feet tall and a tiny water head? Weirdo. Ellen DeGeneres is a Vegan? I thought she ate meat every night! Jenny McCarthy loves Botox. She loves silicon too. Richard Simmons has flammable shorts. Molly Ringwald drinks Kristen Stewart's blood. But alas it's not that time of the month yet. Want to see Taylor Lautner pics? Then go see Breaking Dawn Part 2. Lisa Rinna does advertisements for adult diapers. That's a coincidence because the first time I saw her naked I shit my pants!
Katy Perry dyes her hair purple. That's quite a change from the pink it was last week. Kelsey Grammar has proven you are never too old to get a tattoo or a Viagra prescription. Nicole Kidman does not mind being naked. Trust me when I tell you we don't mind either. Ashton Kutcher is having "intercourse" with Mila Kunis. One more time for those of you from Port Saint Lucie Florida, that's "intercourse". Who's is bigger Angelina's or Jennifer's? What are we talking about? Just ask Brad Pitt, he'll tell you! Seal has a new girlfriend and her name is whatshernameIdon'tcare. Will Pippa Middleton face arrest? Will switching to Progressive really give you better discounts? Taylor Armstrong is "so not ready to date yet". Wait, I don't speak moron, does that mean she wants to date or not? Bow Wow is no longer a wanted man but that doesn't answer the question who let the dogs out?
J-Lo bought Casper Smart a truck for his birthday. Hey, we already know where he likes to park it! Lamar Odom you are fired! Thanks for playing, next time leave the 500lb gorilla at home. Yeah, we are talking to you Kardashian. NBC's Rock Center has coverage more lopsided than Brian Williams' face. Miley Cyrus is not anorexic, she just eats lots of laxatives, get it? LOL? Ann Hathaway's hair is so short she looks like Jerry Seinfeld and there is nothing funny about that. Jennifer Hudson will appear at a murder trial. As a witness or as a defendant? Ah who keeps up with the Kardashians anyway. Khloe Kardashian says Lamar Odom deserved better from the Mavericks. Khloe, try running your fat ass up a basketball court and then you can talk. Is Lindsay Lohan guilty of assault? Only because she attacked my heart. Awwwww. Mila Kunis or Kate Upton? It depends, which one did Justin Timberlake already date? After being arrested for a DUI Amanda Bynes went back to her hotel bar. Maybe it's time she went back to acting because she sure plays a dumbass great in real life.
Read more...|
|
Insidious is a new age Poltergeist with one vital new wrinkle. In the spirit of Paranormal Activity, Insidious is not merely about the standard demonic possession (The Rite), nor is it about exorcisms (The Exorcist). The film’s selling point is astral travel. This phenomenon refers to one’s uncommon ability to travel out of their body to another dimension. This dimension is the spirit world, unseen by unsuspecting human beings. Directors/Writers/Actors Jamess Wan and Leigh Whannell (Saw) do their level best to convince screaming moviegoers that Insidious is another haunted house horror story…until the teases end and the screams begin. Before I delve further, I want to share a humorous story from tonight’s showing. During several dramatic near-death scenes, I heard blood-curdling screams that frightened me. Near the end of the film it dawned on me that those horrifying noises were coming from one insanely terrified young woman sitting two rows beneath me. So much for quietly heralding Dolby Surround Sound! Now, allow me to explain why astral travel is so bloody real.
I must perforce that as a child I had a secret friend who lived in my closet. My mother felt terrified by my habit of speaking to an invisible specter. I also had dreams about traveling around my house and my yard. This sort of apparition continued for me when I was 23 years old when I had night terrors about being invaded by a spirit with whom I struggled. Am I superstitious? Not really. Do I feel that these could be exaggerated nightmares? Of course I do…but when a master of horror exploits what is a nebulous but terrifying concept and turns it into a cinematic portrayal with every thought given to making the audience scared out of their wits, it causes me to question these past occurrences.
In short, Josh (Patrick Wilson) and Renai Lambert (Rose Byrne) have moved to a beautiful new home to accommodate their growing nuclear family. There is the oft-upset baby, scaredy-cat Foster (Andrew Astor), and their wandering comatose brother Dalton (Ty Simpkins). The ghouls that haunt their new house are not selective in their targets. These entities alarm everybody including Renai who witnesses their nefarious activities. With the encouragement of her mother-in-law Barbara (Lorraine Hershey), Renai and Josh move to a smaller house and seemingly to a new beginning. Little do they realize that it is not their house that is haunted, its occupants are!
Without much of a delay the horrific spirit attacks continue. Josh begins to question his wife’s sanity but it quickly convinced when his mother explains a grave element of his childhood. Along with Barbara’s friend (who is a paranormal specialist) Elise Rainer (Lin Shaye), Josh starts to remember that as a child he was an experienced astral traveler. With Elise’s help his memory of being haunted by an elderly specter looking to seize control of his vacant body is partially restored. When they provide proof of the mortal danger Josh faced as a child, and of the imminent danger to Dalton, the husband and father agrees to astral travel to rescue his son. The journey he undertakes (pun intended) is truly hair-raising and scream deafening.
James Wan and Leigh Whannell are quickly establishing themselves as a force in the horror film genre. Insidious has caused me to wonder if designating anything frightening a horror movie may be simplistic an assignment. Perhaps we need to manufacture subdivisions such as “parahorror”, or “astral thrillers”. These may not be the ideal endpoints to match my suggestion but they certainly are a start. To me, traditional horror films such as Halloween, The Collector, Fright Night, and Children of the Korn are about murderers slaying innocent victims. Sure, these killers may be possessed by evil spirits or resurrected from the dead, but their goal is to annihilate people out of a maligned worldview, or to avenge a past injustice. Insidious is about sadistic spirits hovering around the bodies of innocent children that possess the rare ability to astral travel. Being lured away from their tangible vessel by those that seek to return to life at their expense causes them to be vulnerable, and in this case trapped. This concept is not like the Boogeyman, or some sub-demon looking to contort a sleazy young woman’s body to walk on the ceiling. Although I am not an expert at deriving new labels, hopefully I have at least begun a much wider discussion for horror pundits and enthusiasts. Fans, if you have any idea, please be sure to add a comment, I would appreciate it. If comments are not immediately posted, please be patient as our filter must weed out the robots and web spiders. There are creepy crawlers everywhere! Insidious will make you fear for your lives! Well, it will make you at least a little scared.
![]() The Raven ![]() The Five-Year Engagement ![]() Contraband ![]() Detachment ![]() THE THREE STOOGES ![]() War Horse ![]() The Hunger Games ![]() The Iron Lady ![]() American Reunion ![]() Wrath Of The Titans ![]() We Bought a Zoo ![]() The Raven ![]() The Five-Year Engagement ![]() Contraband |
Copyright © 2010 Screen Media, Inc. All rights reserved.
Privacy Policy
Certain product data © 2010-present Screen Media, Inc. For personal use only. All rights reserved.