Box Office Numbers

$103.0MMarvel's The Avengers
$29.6MDark Shadows
$5.8MThink Like a Man
$4.5MThe Hunger Games
$4.1MThe Lucky One
As of May 14, 2012

Hollywood Gossip, Tidbits, and News

 A man has broken the world record for fist pumping buy pumping for 17 hours. My god what an achievement, but we are overlooking how raw his penis must be. The President of Yahoo has been forced to resign because he made an inflated claim on his resume. Meanwhile, in other news, Barak Obama ate dog. Robert Pattinson is 27 going on 17, good for you RSchmuck, I mean RPutz. Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer an item again? Is Jessica Simpson's body still a wonderland? Yes, it's just we are wondering why her territory doubled in size. Is Jay-Z acting like a wild bachelor on the prowl? With a name like Jay-Z I don't think any of us really care. Drake is romancing two cougars? Man, dude's a zookeeper. Does Casper Smart enjoy his five minutes of fame? Is that all he lasts for? Lightweight. Rihanna was recently hospitalized for too much partying. It's ok though, let's keep the focus on Lindsay Lohan, she's white after all. Christina Aguilera is quitting The Voice. John Travolta is not gay, he just like's dudes.   

Mariah and Nick renew their vows in Paris? I bet he showed her the Eiffel Tower. Truth be told, it might have been more like the leaning tower of Pisa. Gwyneth Paltrow has post partum depression. Me too, but it has been quite a while since I was in the womb. Kim K and Lindsay Lohan will attend the White House Correspondent's Dinner. I guess they wanted to see who has the best lines, and I'm not talking about comedy. Jessica Simpson has a baby shower? What is it like 2 feet tall and a tiny water head? Weirdo. Ellen DeGeneres is a Vegan? I thought she ate meat every night! Jenny McCarthy loves Botox. She loves silicon too. Richard Simmons has flammable shorts. Molly Ringwald drinks Kristen Stewart's blood. But alas it's not that time of the month yet. Want to see Taylor Lautner pics? Then go see Breaking Dawn Part 2. Lisa Rinna does advertisements for adult diapers. That's a coincidence because the first time I saw her naked I shit my pants!

Katy Perry dyes her hair purple. That's quite a change from the pink it was last week. Kelsey Grammar has proven you are never too old to get a tattoo or a Viagra prescription. Nicole Kidman does not mind being naked. Trust me when I tell you we don't mind either. Ashton Kutcher is having "intercourse" with Mila Kunis. One more time for those of you from Port Saint Lucie Florida, that's "intercourse". Who's is bigger Angelina's or Jennifer's? What are we talking about? Just ask Brad Pitt, he'll tell you! Seal has a new girlfriend and her name is whatshernameIdon'tcare. Will Pippa Middleton face arrest? Will switching to Progressive really give you better discounts? Taylor Armstrong is "so not ready to date yet". Wait, I don't speak moron, does that mean she wants to date or not? Bow Wow is no longer a wanted man but that doesn't answer the question who let the dogs out?

J-Lo bought Casper Smart a truck for his birthday. Hey, we already know where he likes to park it! Lamar Odom you are fired! Thanks for playing, next time leave the 500lb gorilla at home. Yeah, we are talking to you Kardashian. NBC's Rock Center has coverage more lopsided than Brian Williams' face. Miley Cyrus is not anorexic, she just eats lots of laxatives, get it? LOL? Ann Hathaway's hair is so short she looks like Jerry Seinfeld and there is nothing funny about that. Jennifer Hudson will appear at a murder trial. As a witness or as a defendant? Ah who keeps up with the Kardashians anyway. Khloe Kardashian says Lamar Odom deserved better from the Mavericks. Khloe, try running your fat ass up a basketball court and then you can talk. Is Lindsay Lohan guilty of assault? Only because she attacked my heart. Awwwww. Mila Kunis or Kate Upton? It depends, which one did Justin Timberlake already date? After being arrested for a DUI Amanda Bynes went back to her hotel bar. Maybe it's time she went back to acting because she sure plays a dumbass great in real life.

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Screen Spotlight Featured Reviews

Bruno

Sacha Baron Cohen is the most unique humorist of our time. His brand of humor lacks taste, normalcy, and or dignity. Who is to say what the right ingredients are for the recipe of comic genius? Cohen’s television program during the nineties, Da Ali G. Show featured a freakishly tall interviewer flamboyantly dressed, decked out with oversized sunglasses, in other words, a style that resembles a caricature of a vanilla white guy playing at being a black rapper. Cohen’s show thrived on pretending to be a real generation X. interviewer of famous musicians, politicians, and movie stars. The show lasted only for so long because his audience spread the word that his shtick was merely the act of a clever comedian. Once word spread, in the colloquial, the jig was up. Capitalizing on the lesser-known skits, also portrayed by Cohen, (Borat and Bruno) the comedian decided to make a motion picture. Any two-minute skit can be amusing given the proper comedy writers, acting talent, and HBO's leniency about profane language. Developing a two-minute skit into a feature film requires incredible devotion and talent. Borat, the story of a famous villager from a destitute district in Kazakhstan, who decides to produce a movie for the benefit of his country, is widely recognized as the greatest pseudo-documentary in the history of filmmaking. Although most older adults despise his brand of humor, and find it to be more vulgar than anything they had ever witnessed prior thereto, younger audiences find Cohen hysterical. The success of Borat begged the question: would Cohen be able to duplicate this success given the entire world knew of his true identity as a television and filmmaking comedian who embarrassed the stars? Bruno is just as formulaic as Borat, only instead of being a heterosexual character with homosexual tendencies; Bruno is a hard-core, slapstick, in your face gay man for the ages…

       This movie contains at least a dozen different dildos, some of which are attached to bicycles and cars. The character is dressed in a fashion that makes heterosexual men laugh in hysteria while uttering "that is the gayest thing I have ever seen." The vulgar nature of Cohen’s anal penetration scenes, Arial anal breakfast scene, and attempts at the seduction of various straight men can produce only one of two effects: wild laughter, or eye-closing cringing. One critic wrote that there are 62 laughs in this movie. 62 is a great overestimate; 20 to 30 is a more realistic projection. Again we must question, is it worth sitting through something this disgusting for 20 to 30 laughs? That depends on your definition of disgusting (LOL).

       The celebrities whom Bruno attempts to humiliate are Congressman Ron Paul, who is a former presidential candidate, Harrison Ford, and Angelina Jolie. Speaking of Angelina Jolie, Cohen goes on a talk show after picking up a small black child contained in a box at an airport. He informs the primarily black hayseed audience the baby's name is OJ, a "traditional African name." This highlights the degree to which Cohen will reduce normalcy for a laugh. The entire time the audience's faces are being filmed, and the panoramic view of their peturbance is nothing short of classic. Scenes in which Bruno rocks OJ’s cradle by protruding a dildo from a stationary exercise bike onto the side of the bed are supposed to be shocking enough to elicit laughter.

       Bruno is an awful lot like Borat both in its characters and its brand of humor. The scenes are deliberately ribald, and the intent is to expose people's anti-Semitism, racial bigotry, and heterosexual sensitivity to homosexuality. In this they succeeded masterfully. On the other hand, Cohen’s use of Nazi imagery, and invocation of Hitler several times, including one despicable holocaust reference, will only serve to allow anti-Semites a good laugh at the expense of Jewish people. For this I fault Cohen and automatically lower the rating of this film. There is nothing funny, even if true, about a mother allowing her daughter, in order to have a Hollywood job, push a Jewish baby in a red wheelbarrow into a fake fiery crematorium. Sorry for spoiling this scene, but I am rather outraged if for nothing else, for that alone.

       Now, the $60 million question: would I recommend audiences watch this film? Of course. This is much like its predecessor, a movie that is a must-watch-for-yourself. Only an individual person can judge this film appropriately. In doing so I strongly recommend that you are not going to alter your opinion based on the person seated next to you disagreeing with your thoughts about this film. One may love it, one may hate it, or one might feel ambiguous about the entire affair. One thing is for certain; Sacha Baron Cohen has audiences in the palm of his hand, and if I am any judge of Hollywood, this supreme Jewish comedian will be back with a vengeance to shock us all for at least one more time.

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