Have you heard about Tucker Max? I heard from my brother that Tucker Max wrote a book based on insulting women while drinking heavily and then trying to seduce them after being a complete jerk. Sounds like the funniest premise ever right? This brings me to the film I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell…
I cannot remember watching a movie in the past decade so much like the original Bachelor Party or Animal House, true classics that are in no way spotfests (The Hangover!) or contrived beyond belief (Wedding Crashers). I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell is funny from the first instant until the final moments of exasperating exhalation. The three primary characters are a trio of best friends and a nice sampling of personality types to boot. We have the bodacious, semi-charming, raucous, disgusting alcoholic slut Tucker Max. His best friends are groom to be Geoff and curmudgeon extraordinaire Drew. This movie/novel is allegedly based on a true story. Usually I question that statement when attached to a film. In this case I somehow believe Mr. Max. While quarreling with my girlfriend over whether or not she should watch this movie with me I came to the conclusion that everyone has a wild past. Perhaps not Tucker Max wild, but who has not insulted a member of the opposite sex in the hopes of compelling their addiction center to find you attractive?
What could be more fun than drinking, hitting on crowds of beautiful woman, and managing to insult several of them at the same time? Call me a chauvinist if you like but this movie brought back memories of college and my early twenties. It is quite simple the funniest made for male eyes only movie in twenty years. To whet your whistle (if you are still reading and not fuming), Tucker and Geoff are best friends and law students. Tucker’s goal in life is to sleep with "dysfunctional" or "disadvantaged women (the deaf, the blind, midgets, etc). Hearing about a midget stripper’s legal battle over being fired, he tracks her whereabouts to a full contact strip club hours away from where Geoff lives with his soon to be wife. He lies to Geoff’s fiancé and drives his friends to what seems like paradise. First they arrived at a bar full of women who would make any man drool. After spending three hours buying them drinks and flirting, Drew’s anger (his girlfriend cheated on him with a gangster rapper) and Tucker’s crude comments drove them away. Of course this is not before he called one of them a "prude bitch" who is a killjoy. Come on folks there is always one person male or female who acts like clubbing is terrible and pretends to hate everything to mask their deficiencies/insecurities.
From the trendy club they finally found the strip club chock full of strippers with boyfriends but who were willing to do any sexual act for the right price. Drew and a single mother stripper randomly fell in love by trading vicious insults and Tucker found his midget stripper who he could not spin like a top (she was too shallow). Meanwhile Geoff’s fiancé called to find out his whereabouts and overheard the DJ on the loudspeaker announce the name of the strip club and the location. Oops, Tucker screwed his best friend again. She nearly called the wedding off, and Geoff began imbibing liquor at an alarming rate. When Tucker tells the group of strippers to dance with Geoff he accidentally elbowed one in the nose causing her to gush blood and the bouncer to throw him threw a table. Geoff spent the night in prison bloodied and battered and humiliated.
The remainder of the movie was about Drew finding love, and Tucker and Geoff splitting as friends. Before Geoff’s wedding which Tucker was not invited to on account of his deception and childish antics, he insulted a portly girl at a bar. In revenge she spiked his drink with extra strength laxative. Unfortunately Tucker picked up a smoking hot hottie who drank the turbo lax (not TurboTax, different products people) and they both defecated uncontrollably. Unfortunately for Tucker his date overflowed the hotel room toilet causing him to run to the bathroom in the lobby and shit all over the floor along the way.
Watch at your own peril if with a date. It could be gold or dynamite. Tucker Max is now a legend and not a myth. Wish you were him? Or maybe just for an instant…
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