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Box Office Numbers

$	103.0M	Marvel's The Avengers
$	29.6M	Dark Shadows
$	5.8M	Think Like a Man
$	4.5M	The Hunger Games
$	4.1M	The Lucky One
As of May 14, 2012

Hollywood Gossip, Tidbits, and News

A man has broken the world record for fist pumping buy pumping for 17 hours. My god what an achievement, but we are overlooking how raw his penis must be. The President of Yahoo has been forced to resign because he made an inflated claim on his resume. Meanwhile, in other news, Barak Obama ate dog. Robert Pattinson is 27 going on 17, good for you RSchmuck, I mean RPutz. Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer an item again? Is Jessica Simpson's body still a wonderland? Yes, it's just we are wondering why her territory doubled in size. Is Jay-Z acting like a wild bachelor on the prowl? With a name like Jay-Z I don't think any of us really care. Drake is romancing two cougars? Man, dude's a zookeeper. Does Casper Smart enjoy his five minutes of fame? Is that all he lasts for? Lightweight. Rihanna was recently hospitalized for too much partying. It's ok though, let's keep the focus on Lindsay Lohan, she's white after all. Christina Aguilera is quitting The Voice. John Travolta is not gay, he just like's dudes.

Mariah and Nick renew their vows in Paris? I bet he showed her the Eiffel Tower. Truth be told, it might have been more like the leaning tower of Pisa. Gwyneth Paltrow has post partum depression. Me too, but it has been quite a while since I was in the womb. Kim K and Lindsay Lohan will attend the White House Correspondent's Dinner. I guess they wanted to see who has the best lines, and I'm not talking about comedy. Jessica Simpson has a baby shower? What is it like 2 feet tall and a tiny water head? Weirdo. Ellen DeGeneres is a Vegan? I thought she ate meat every night! Jenny McCarthy loves Botox. She loves silicon too. Richard Simmons has flammable shorts. Molly Ringwald drinks Kristen Stewart's blood. But alas it's not that time of the month yet. Want to see Taylor Lautner pics? Then go see Breaking Dawn Part 2. Lisa Rinna does advertisements for adult diapers. That's a coincidence because the first time I saw her naked I shit my pants!

Katy Perry dyes her hair purple. That's quite a change from the pink it was last week. Kelsey Grammar has proven you are never too old to get a tattoo or a Viagra prescription. Nicole Kidman does not mind being naked. Trust me when I tell you we don't mind either. Ashton Kutcher is having "intercourse" with Mila Kunis. One more time for those of you from Port Saint Lucie Florida, that's "intercourse". Who's is bigger Angelina's or Jennifer's? What are we talking about? Just ask Brad Pitt, he'll tell you! Seal has a new girlfriend and her name is whatshernameIdon'tcare. Will Pippa Middleton face arrest? Will switching to Progressive really give you better discounts? Taylor Armstrong is "so not ready to date yet". Wait, I don't speak moron, does that mean she wants to date or not? Bow Wow is no longer a wanted man but that doesn't answer the question who let the dogs out?

J-Lo bought Casper Smart a truck for his birthday. Hey, we already know where he likes to park it! Lamar Odom you are fired! Thanks for playing, next time leave the 500lb gorilla at home. Yeah, we are talking to you Kardashian. NBC's Rock Center has coverage more lopsided than Brian Williams' face. Miley Cyrus is not anorexic, she just eats lots of laxatives, get it? LOL? Ann Hathaway's hair is so short she looks like Jerry Seinfeld and there is nothing funny about that. Jennifer Hudson will appear at a murder trial. As a witness or as a defendant? Ah who keeps up with the Kardashians anyway. Khloe Kardashian says Lamar Odom deserved better from the Mavericks. Khloe, try running your fat ass up a basketball court and then you can talk. Is Lindsay Lohan guilty of assault? Only because she attacked my heart. Awwwww. Mila Kunis or Kate Upton? It depends, which one did Justin Timberlake already date? After being arrested for a DUI Amanda Bynes went back to her hotel bar. Maybe it's time she went back to acting because she sure plays a dumbass great in real life.

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Screen Spotlight Featured Reviews

Football Movies

Written by Jonathan Jacobs

Hollywood’s Elite Football Movies: The Most HILARIOUS review of 2007, a must read.

Happy Super Bowl Sunday Everyone!!!

SemiTough What's better than the combination of Amway style self help seminars, football and Burt Reynolds being called "Billy-Clyde"? Apparently the 70's was the start of the new age lifestyle. Personally, I must have missed the boat being knee deep in Voltron re-runs. As would become a typical scenario, in this movie the players are all bruised and battered, with their lives crumbling around them. Did they have Bayer Aspirin in the 70's? Kris Kristofferson and Burt Reynolds are roommates and close friends, both honing in on the same woman. Rightly so, she had a pre 80's metal hair-do and was somehow attractive. This movie has all of the necessary stitching; humor, cult leaders, Carl Weathers in a movie other than Rocky, and Brian Dennehy so large it looks like he consumed the entire front line. I recommend this movie to anyone looking for something a little different and light hearted.

North Dallas Forty

This film is ruthless and full of machismo. Nick Nolte is struggling to cope with the actions of his teammates on and off the field. He faces personal demons, the game, and the typical upper management. Both the locker scenes and the game scenes are painful to watch.

Once having had athleticism before I discovered Dunkin Donuts, I recall sitting in the locker room with ice packs and Icy Hot smeared across my midriff. There is a lot of pain in this sport and this movie does a great job of showing audiences what football world is really like.

If you have pre-teens looking to play football, this may be a good one to have them watch, just hope they don't take up Ballet as an alternative and start watching Fame on PBS.

The Longest Yard

Burt Reynolds was well cast as the loveable quarterback, and the supporting cast could not have been better. Richard Kiel aka 'JAWS' is a perfect fit for this film due to the intimidation factor. I will not say anything negative about this film. This is a loveable gang of rapists, murderers and hardened criminals. I don't plan on having them over for Christmas dinner, but I will certainly enjoy watching them on TIVO. This film mixes in necessary gratuitous violence, and a subtle element of humor that brings this movie to the level of blockbuster success.

The Longest Yard - Remake

Adam Sandler has too much free time. This is a moderately enjoyable film at best. Call me Mr. Beefy if I am wrong, but how about a 'Celebrity Death Match' between Dalip Singh (Turley) and Richard Kiel (JAWS). Any who, if you want a good laugh, some 3rd grade antics, penis jokes, and cross dressed washed up Saturday Night Live never will be's, this is the movie for you.

Rudy

Rudy is a heart-warming film about a less than average sized guy trying to play football with the Juggernauts of the college world. A lot of this of course, is unrealistic, and this is far from David vs. Goliath. Being an 80's movie fan, I am more partial to LUCAS, since the football scene climaxed into the brutal reality of what should have happened to Rudy.

Any Given Sunday

Oliver Stone gives us his take on professional football. There is a stellar cast, close-up shots, dramatic sequences and sound. For us football history buffs, I see too much familiarity between the Joe Montana and Steve Young relationship here from the 90's. The managerial aspect of the film is entertaining, but also pulls from older films such as The Last Boy Scout. What is the overall message here? Football is violent? There is a lot of corruption?

Varsity Blues

This movie should have been filmed in Vermont at a Cheese farm. My coach is mean, my friend got hurt, do you like my whipped cream bikini? Although the answer is yes to the bikini, the answer to the rest of the movie is like opening a pack of life savers. Is this drama? A teen comedy? A football movie? I was not quite sure when I finished watching this, nor do I know what flavor I ended up with literally and figuratively.

Jerry McGuire

Tom Cruise and Cuba Gooding Junior star in this movie about the love of the game, and the trials and tribulations of the football world. This may very well be the best football movie to date due to the purity of relationships shown, the cruelty of the "agent" world, and the dedication it takes on and off the field. There is nothing overdramatized here. We could have done without the "you had me at hello" bit, but in the end, the film needed to make money and appeal to a wider audience.

The Replacements

Keanu Reeves stars as a once famous college quarterback afraid to fail, so he has taken the road less travelled and scrapes barnacles for a living? Putting that aside, this is a fun movie. The dynamics of the relationships that develop are fun to watch, and the multitudes of beautiful women thrown into the mix are even better.

Wildcats

Goldie Hawn schools a bunch of high school misfits into a championship team. That just about sums it up. Slow and minimally enjoyable.

Necessary Roughness

NCAA sanctions force the Texas State University Fightin' Armadillos to form a football team from their student body. Ultimately there are 13 players, a 34 year old Quarterback shagging his teacher, a cynical hard ass dean of students, the list goes on an on. This is a great film, not for its intellectual endeavors, but for its love of the game and the director’s obvious love of comedy.

The Program

This movie emphasizes the pressures that go along with playing football at a major university. We enter the world of drinking, drugs, rape, lack of education, and the overall "turning the other cheek" mentality towards these players and any of their wrong doings. This movie represents college football at its best and most honest.