Screen Spotlight

Home / Movie Categories / Action/Adventure / Twilight: New Moon

Browse by Category

Hot New Movies

Box Office Numbers

$	103.0M	Marvel's The Avengers
$	29.6M	Dark Shadows
$	5.8M	Think Like a Man
$	4.5M	The Hunger Games
$	4.1M	The Lucky One
As of May 14, 2012

Hollywood Gossip, Tidbits, and News

A man has broken the world record for fist pumping buy pumping for 17 hours. My god what an achievement, but we are overlooking how raw his penis must be. The President of Yahoo has been forced to resign because he made an inflated claim on his resume. Meanwhile, in other news, Barak Obama ate dog. Robert Pattinson is 27 going on 17, good for you RSchmuck, I mean RPutz. Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer an item again? Is Jessica Simpson's body still a wonderland? Yes, it's just we are wondering why her territory doubled in size. Is Jay-Z acting like a wild bachelor on the prowl? With a name like Jay-Z I don't think any of us really care. Drake is romancing two cougars? Man, dude's a zookeeper. Does Casper Smart enjoy his five minutes of fame? Is that all he lasts for? Lightweight. Rihanna was recently hospitalized for too much partying. It's ok though, let's keep the focus on Lindsay Lohan, she's white after all. Christina Aguilera is quitting The Voice. John Travolta is not gay, he just like's dudes.

Mariah and Nick renew their vows in Paris? I bet he showed her the Eiffel Tower. Truth be told, it might have been more like the leaning tower of Pisa. Gwyneth Paltrow has post partum depression. Me too, but it has been quite a while since I was in the womb. Kim K and Lindsay Lohan will attend the White House Correspondent's Dinner. I guess they wanted to see who has the best lines, and I'm not talking about comedy. Jessica Simpson has a baby shower? What is it like 2 feet tall and a tiny water head? Weirdo. Ellen DeGeneres is a Vegan? I thought she ate meat every night! Jenny McCarthy loves Botox. She loves silicon too. Richard Simmons has flammable shorts. Molly Ringwald drinks Kristen Stewart's blood. But alas it's not that time of the month yet. Want to see Taylor Lautner pics? Then go see Breaking Dawn Part 2. Lisa Rinna does advertisements for adult diapers. That's a coincidence because the first time I saw her naked I shit my pants!

Katy Perry dyes her hair purple. That's quite a change from the pink it was last week. Kelsey Grammar has proven you are never too old to get a tattoo or a Viagra prescription. Nicole Kidman does not mind being naked. Trust me when I tell you we don't mind either. Ashton Kutcher is having "intercourse" with Mila Kunis. One more time for those of you from Port Saint Lucie Florida, that's "intercourse". Who's is bigger Angelina's or Jennifer's? What are we talking about? Just ask Brad Pitt, he'll tell you! Seal has a new girlfriend and her name is whatshernameIdon'tcare. Will Pippa Middleton face arrest? Will switching to Progressive really give you better discounts? Taylor Armstrong is "so not ready to date yet". Wait, I don't speak moron, does that mean she wants to date or not? Bow Wow is no longer a wanted man but that doesn't answer the question who let the dogs out?

J-Lo bought Casper Smart a truck for his birthday. Hey, we already know where he likes to park it! Lamar Odom you are fired! Thanks for playing, next time leave the 500lb gorilla at home. Yeah, we are talking to you Kardashian. NBC's Rock Center has coverage more lopsided than Brian Williams' face. Miley Cyrus is not anorexic, she just eats lots of laxatives, get it? LOL? Ann Hathaway's hair is so short she looks like Jerry Seinfeld and there is nothing funny about that. Jennifer Hudson will appear at a murder trial. As a witness or as a defendant? Ah who keeps up with the Kardashians anyway. Khloe Kardashian says Lamar Odom deserved better from the Mavericks. Khloe, try running your fat ass up a basketball court and then you can talk. Is Lindsay Lohan guilty of assault? Only because she attacked my heart. Awwwww. Mila Kunis or Kate Upton? It depends, which one did Justin Timberlake already date? After being arrested for a DUI Amanda Bynes went back to her hotel bar. Maybe it's time she went back to acting because she sure plays a dumbass great in real life.

Hot New Movies

Screen Spotlight Featured Reviews

Twilight: New Moon

Written by Jonathan Jacobs

If Twilight the original was the hypothesis, Twilight: New Moon is the proof. Stephanie Meyer’s novels work on the big screen. This version based on book 2 is almost identical to the novel. It is never easy translating the printed word into a silver screen production, but almost nothing is lost in translation here. If anything, the screenwriters updated the wittiness of the script to entice our sarcastic cravings.

New Moon? More like full moon, fever! Let’s forget about the rookie projectionist who could not center a sexual advance were he lucky enough to have one. Instead, we need to focus on the fascinating audience demographic. I counted 60% 13 year old girls, 20% morbidly obese vampire wannabees, 18% horny men dragged along to call Edward Edwin from Narnia, and 2% my girlfriend and myself.

Fans salivated over the prospect of an Edward Cullen-Jacob Black-Bella Swan love triangle and it is here to stay. After witnessing Bella’s vulnerability Edward does the brave (or cowardly?) act of leaving her to live without the danger of vampires. He does this while realizing his enemies want to kill Bella. Good move!

During her months of despair Jacob Black becomes her best friend. Though enamored with her, Jacob controls his emotions and hormones in order to remain in her life. The situation changes when he reaches full maturity and transforms into a werewolf. Unsurprisingly, Bella finds this metamorphosis fascinating. Jacob Black (portrayed by Taylor Lautner) is by virtue of CGI a flawless wolf. She is in love with him as her best friend, daredevil rescuer, and savior, but she still pines for Edward. In a moment of idiocy Edward calls for Bella and Jacob intimates she is dead. Immediately awestruck, Cullen decides to invoke the Volturi who are centuries old vampires in order to request a formal suicide.

Once rescued from Volturi headquarters (with some chicanery and a few harrowing moments) somewhere in Italy (how she afforded a plane ticket and gained a passport in 6 minutes and then flew 8-12 hours across the world to make it on time is truly the smoke and mirrors of Hollywood), Edward returns to Forks with Bella. They are immediately greeted by Jacob whose rage causes another transformation. Bella stands between Edward and Jake and tells her werewolf best friend she loves him but would never leave her one true love. In order to secure their release from the Volturi Edward promised to turn Bella. He reneges on his promise but the Cullen family takes a vote in her favor. Edward’s one request is that Bella marry him first and on this note the movie ends with a cliffhanger (not a cliff-dive people!).

Although everybody believed the second movie could not be worse than the first utter fiasco, it is a pleasant surprise to see Twilight go from a 1/10 to a 9/10 in the course of a year. My only complaint is that teenage girls froth at the mouth over Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner who both are wearing makeup, spray on abs, and have professional hair stylists. The amount of libido in young kids these days is appalling. Put a leash on your 12 year old, if she would literally scream at the sight of an actor what else would she do? The cult of popularity surrounding celebrities is something to behold. We live in a different day and age now. Great movie, pitiful crowd, Robert Pattinson is due for a break out role.