Four Lions

Written by Jonathan Jacobs

“Islam is cracking up. Women are talking back. People are playing stringed instruments. It is the end of days.” If you have not laughed hysterically at this quotation then it is likely Four Lions is not for you. If you, much like your humble reviewer, were amused by the “stringed instruments” portion I recommend Four Lions as an off-the-wall movie that will blow your house down (if you are into that sort of thing). When four British jihadist wannabes decide sitting Indian style on a concrete floor in someone’s basement is not quite confrontational enough, they search out a new avenue for wreaking havoc. While Four Lions addresses the British and international stereotype that all Muslims are bomb-wielding artists of death, it also offers a comedic edge that is rarely seen in the discussion of what it means to be labeled “dangerous” just for looking more tanned than the next guy.

     Waj, Berry, Omar and Fessal are members of a British “underground” jihadist sect known as the “Four Lions”. Much like the loudest person at a party, the Lions are all talk and no action. Barry (a man who is as white as I am with the exception of his moustache ride beard) is their militant leader. He continually demands action yet he is incredulous to follow through with any serious plan presented. When Omar receives a message from a man whose code name is “Uncle” (how clever indeed) he is summoned to a “wedding”. He comically tells his mall security guard boss he is going to a “shotgun” wedding in Pakistan. Again, if this deadpan humor is not to your liking please do not waste your time. This film is an acquired taste.

     When the group conglomerates for a pre-Pakistan road trip meeting, Barry instructs everyone to eat their Sim cards (telephone identity and memory chips). When Omar arrives late and finds the team swallowing their Sim cards he calls them bloody idiots because the chips will remain in their digestive tracts for days during which they will have a homing beacon in their intestines. It appears their ring leader Barry will say anything, no matter how absurd, to convince them he is taking action. Well, anything other than taking action that is. Adding to the humor is their paranoia about being tracked by MI6 or the CIA. Why would anybody keep tabs on four average citizens with no criminal history to speak of?

     Before leaving the Lions attempt to shoot a video for “Western” eyes despite already living in the west. Unfortunately for them, most of the camera sequences are bloopers. At one point a member of the Lions is holding a gun that looks puny in his hands. His excuse is not that the gun is puny and worthless; it is that his hands are “too big”. In one of the scenes two members are contradicting one another and providing long-winded explications for their future jihadist activities. It seems that Barry has led the Lions down the path of failure via sustained inaction. They have accomplished nothing and feel slighted. This is why everyone except for Barry decides to attend the terrorist “how-to” training seminar in the Pakistani mountains. One cannot be a mujahedeen (a Muslim guerrilla warrior engaged in jihad) without taking the necessary steps to becoming an active member of a terrorist cell.

     I suppose I would feel neglectful if I did not point out the reason why I deem Four Lions a comedy film. All four members, Waj, Barry, Omar and Fessal, are Muslim (Barry is thoroughly Caucasian but this is a movie!) yet they look British, everyone speaks English with heavy United Kingdom accents, and they are not under duress for any reason or at any time. The Lions are not shown in any scene being discriminated against. Instead, all four members seem to have nice lives and Omar is married with a beautiful wife and daughter. There is no reason one can pinpoint for their interest in jihadism except for their disappointment over the popular perception that Muslims are trouble-makers. To think British that Muslims would dedicate their lives to warfare and murder because there is a perception that some Muslims are terrorists is actually not so silly now that I have written this sentence. Barry is the plotter and the obvious fanaticist. He devises a scheme to combine his cohorts' training and enthusiasm for violence with his plan to destroy a mosque in order to make a statement about Muslims losing their bellicose ways.

     Four Lions is what it is; a comedic mockumentary of sorts portraying what becomes of Muslim youths in Europe when they feel a need to identify with their culture more so than that of their host nation. Feeling the need to rebel is quite normal, but learning to be a mountain dweller wielding machine guns and killing people is not the right fit for the Four Lions. It is also shocking that virtually anyone is able to attend terrorist training camp, and can do so easily. Forget summer camp or fat camp parents, we’ve got something even better. Think what you want about Four Lions, I appreciate it for the message I believe Director Christopher Morris (a British T.V. and radio satirist) is sending.

Jonathan Jacobs

Member FFCC

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