Box Office Numbers

$55.6MMarvel's The Avengers
$25.5MBattleship
$17.4MThe Dictator
$12.5MDark Shadows
$10.5MWhat to Expect When You're Expecting
As of May 21, 2012

Hollywood Gossip, Tidbits, and News

An office worker has been fired for her whistle, distracting nice boobs, figure and look at that...Maria Menounos gained 6 pounds on Dancing with the Has Beens. Kristen Stewart is number 15 on Maxim's 100 Hot List. I wonder how her acting ranks on the S*it List? These days Hugh Hefner spends more time in the kitchen than in the bedroom. John Mayer regrets dissing Jessica Simpson and Jen Aniston in interviews. We just regret John Mayer. Is Bar Rafaeli the hottest woman in the world? Dude, your girlfriend is the hottest woman in the world and don't you ever forget it! Justin Bieber is dating high school students? Man guys at that age are so impressionable. Kate Gosselin says she and Jon have made peace. Awww, that's special. Once their fame ran out they stopped cheating. That's really sweet. Why does Kelly Clarkson lose weight when she's only going to put it back on? Heidi Klum felt more special as a blond. Ah, the world's most profound questions answered as only a super model can. 

A man has broken the world record for fist pumping by pumping for 17 hours. My god what an achievement, but we are overlooking how raw his penis must be. The President of Yahoo has been forced to resign because he made an inflated claim on his resume. Meanwhile, in other news, Barak Obama ate dog. Robert Pattinson is 27 going on 17, good for you RSchmuck, I mean RPutz. Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer an item again? Is Jessica Simpson's body still a wonderland? Yes, it's just we are wondering why her territory doubled in size. Is Jay-Z acting like a wild bachelor on the prowl? With a name like Jay-Z I don't think any of us really care. Drake is romancing two cougars? Man, dude's a zookeeper. Does Casper Smart enjoy his five minutes of fame? Is that all he lasts for? Lightweight. Rihanna was recently hospitalized for too much partying. It's ok though, let's keep the focus on Lindsay Lohan, she's white after all. Christina Aguilera is quitting The Voice. John Travolta is not gay, he just like's dudes.   

Mariah and Nick renew their vows in Paris? I bet he showed her the Eiffel Tower. Truth be told, it might have been more like the leaning tower of Pisa. Gwyneth Paltrow has post partum depression. Me too, but it has been quite a while since I was in the womb. Kim K and Lindsay Lohan will attend the White House Correspondent's Dinner. I guess they wanted to see who has the best lines, and I'm not talking about comedy. Jessica Simpson has a baby shower? What is it like 2 feet tall and a tiny water head? Weirdo. Ellen DeGeneres is a Vegan? I thought she ate meat every night! Jenny McCarthy loves Botox. She loves silicon too. Richard Simmons has flammable shorts. Molly Ringwald drinks Kristen Stewart's blood. But alas it's not that time of the month yet. Want to see Taylor Lautner pics? Then go see Breaking Dawn Part 2. Lisa Rinna does advertisements for adult diapers. That's a coincidence because the first time I saw her naked I shit my pants!

Katy Perry dyes her hair purple. That's quite a change from the pink it was last week. Kelsey Grammar has proven you are never too old to get a tattoo or a Viagra prescription. Nicole Kidman does not mind being naked. Trust me when I tell you we don't mind either. Ashton Kutcher is having "intercourse" with Mila Kunis. One more time for those of you from Port Saint Lucie Florida, that's "intercourse". Who's is bigger Angelina's or Jennifer's? What are we talking about? Just ask Brad Pitt, he'll tell you! Seal has a new girlfriend and her name is whatshernameIdon'tcare. Will Pippa Middleton face arrest? Will switching to Progressive really give you better discounts? Taylor Armstrong is "so not ready to date yet". Wait, I don't speak moron, does that mean she wants to date or not? Bow Wow is no longer a wanted man but that doesn't answer the question who let the dogs out?

J-Lo bought Casper Smart a truck for his birthday. Hey, we already know where he likes to park it! Lamar Odom you are fired! Thanks for playing, next time leave the 500lb gorilla at home. Yeah, we are talking to you Kardashian. NBC's Rock Center has coverage more lopsided than Brian Williams' face. Miley Cyrus is not anorexic, she just eats lots of laxatives, get it? LOL? Ann Hathaway's hair is so short she looks like Jerry Seinfeld and there is nothing funny about that. Jennifer Hudson will appear at a murder trial. As a witness or as a defendant? Ah who keeps up with the Kardashians anyway. Khloe Kardashian says Lamar Odom deserved better from the Mavericks. Khloe, try running your fat ass up a basketball court and then you can talk. Is Lindsay Lohan guilty of assault? Only because she attacked my heart. Awwwww. Mila Kunis or Kate Upton? It depends, which one did Justin Timberlake already date? After being arrested for a DUI Amanda Bynes went back to her hotel bar. Maybe it's time she went back to acting because she sure plays a dumbass great in real life.

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Screen Spotlight Featured Reviews

Disney's Tangled

The days of Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King, and The Little Mermaid are gone. Do not despair animated film enthusiasts. In their stead Disney has served up a potpourri of films that are generated by the currents of contemporary society. In many cases this spells (magical of course!) disaster. Keep in mind that we remember only a select few animated movies as the very best. Not every production will razzle-dazzle general audiences and steal our hearts forevermore. Disney has a winning mindset and they are not afraid to experiment with new twists on old concepts. Having written that preface, it is time to announce that Tangled is a new age Disney classic that deserves a place in the contemporary pantheon of animated all stars.

Rapunzel (the vocal superstar Mandy Moore) is a beautiful, spellbinding princess but she is has no idea what her true identity is. Only one day old, a selfish withering woman (the lovely Donna Murphy voicing Mother Gothel) captures and kidnaps her. Rapunzel retains only a few fleeting memories of that one day in her true environment but she needs triggers to unlock them. Mother Gothel spends every moment of her unsuspecting kidnapped princess’ life reinforcing the idea that she is the young woman’s true mother. This is the sort of phenomenon we hear about in the news almost every day. Encapsulating it in a children’s film is both educational and really clever.

Rapunzel is no ordinary princess. She possesses a magical power that can only be realized when she invokes a song while her hair covers someone’s wounds. Her hair is so powerful that it maintains Gothel’s appearance as a young woman irrespective of her advanced age. This is unnatural and comes at a price. Rapunzel is essentially trapped inside of an obscured tower nearby her true kingdom for 18 years. On her eighteenth birthday she requests permission to leave and explore the world. As usual, Mother Gothel develops new excuses for why she cannot run off. The world is unsafe, there are vagabonds, Rapunzel is too weak, and the list continues. The abnormally young woman (Gothel) is cruel and punishing to her “daughter” without just cause.

Fortunately for Rapunzel and her friend/companion Pascal (the cutest and most expressive chameleon I have ever seen) trouble finds her and so begins her new adventure that will culminate in the late beginning of her new life. Wanted thief Flynn Rider (Zachary Levi) flees the King’s huntsmen and his former associates the Stabbington Brothers (both played by Hellboy himself, Ron Perlman). In the process he stumbles on a concealed tower and wanders in to safety. Once inside he is assailed by Rapunzel. She smacks him in the skull with a frying pan, a weapon that she makes famous. Apparently our princess is not so fragile after all! Along with Pascal, she keeps Flynn prisoner until he promises to take her to the kingdom to see the most beautiful site in the world, the floating lanterns. For some reason, on her birthday every year, all of the citizens of the kingdom release floating lanterns that light up the night sky with such vigor and beauty (this is a beacon in the night sky guiding their lost princess to her true home).

Along their journey, Rapunzel and Flynn fall in love. Flynn’s real name is revealed as Eugene. He is a handsome young man that has taken to pilfery to make his way in the world. Being with Rapunzel changes his attitude toward honor and truthfulness. Several times she is forced to mend his wounds with her healing hair. On a side note, Rapunzel’s hair must be hundreds of feet long. It is golden and beautiful but somebody had better call Mr. Paul Mitchell before those split ends cause a natural disaster! If she cuts any of her hair, that portion will turn brunette and permanently lose its medicinal properties. Rapunzel and Flynn are being chased by Maximus, the kingdom’s most dashing horse, by the king’s men, and they even manage to find trouble at a local inn. It is through Rapunzel’s beautiful singing voice and courage that they make friends of the most beastly and gritty of men.

During their adventures on their way to the palace, Mother Gothel is always watching and waiting in the wings. She is determined to manipulate Rapunzel into returning to their keep. Her tactics are rude, crude, and dude, they are malicious. With parents like her who needs moms (aside from Mars). It is the tavern’s regulars and the hilarious horse that ultimately grasp her twisted plan and help prevent her misery from spreading.

Disney’s 50th animated feature film Tangled is spectacular in 3D, in Blu-ray and it is more than adequate on regular DVD. Mandy Moore is so talented and every ounce of her ability seeps through into her character. Rapunzel and Flynn are very modern but not insofar as they are stupid dimwits that use Twitter and the word “like” fifty times a minute. They are gorgeous, mature, heartfelt and intelligent teenagers. Naturally, being a Disney film, Tangled has a happy ending, as does the fairy tale it is based on. This animated classic deserves a place in my film library and in all likelihood it will in yours too.

Disney’s four disc Blu-ray combo pack includes the 3D Blu-ray, the Blu-ray, the DVD, and the digital copy of Tangled. The bonus features offer extended songs with Mandy Moore, deleted scenes, details about Rapunzel’s hair (length, volume, etc), and a wonderful video montage of fifty Disney animated feature films.

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