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Brock Lesnar Here Come The Pain! DVD

Created on Sunday, 18 July 2010 04:00

Written by Jonathan Jacobs

From the moment Brock Lesnar first appeared in the WWE in March, 2002, he was an unstoppable force. After watching Brock destroy superstar after superstar, and then win the World Title, it was unthinkable that he would be out of wrestling a mere two years later, quitting over the travel schedule and being burnt out. Brock would go on to tryout for the Minnesota Vikings football team, before he was cut by the end of their preseason. A couple of years later, Brock would join the UFC, winning their Heavyweight title in only his third fight.

Released in 2003, “Here Comes The Pain” is a single DVD containing six of Lesnar’s greatest matches, along with a one hour documentary (with no narrator). The match selection is excellent, and is a great value if you’re looking for Brock’s most memorable matches (other than the memorably “bowling shoe ugly” match between Lesnar and Goldberg at WrestleMania 20, as Jim Ross has called it).

The first match on the DVD is Hogan vs. Lesnar, from a Smackdown show that aired on August 8, 2002. The winner of this match would face The Rock for the undisputed championship at SummerSlam (Brock already had the title shot, but agreed to put it on the line after Hogan goaded him into doing so). No entrances are shown for this match.

A highlight of the match was when Brock gives the Hulkster a big powerbomb as a counter to Hogan’s second turnbuckle punches, definitely one of Hogan’s biggest bumps of the year. Eventually, Hogan kicks out of a pinfall attempt and Hulks up, but Lesnar ends up kicking out of the legdrop of doom. Paul Heyman, Brock’s manager (and one of my favorite wrestling personalities of all time) interferes, leading to an F-5 by Brock, followed up by a bear hug that makes Hogan bleed from the mouth and pass out (the arm falls three times for likely the first time in Hogan’s career, giving Brock the victory). Post-match, Brock takes a steel chair and smashes Hogan in the skull (great line by Heyman, as he pleads with Brock not to hit Hogan: “BROCK – You’re gonna kill him!”) Brock goes back to the ring, taunts Hogan and wipes Hogan’s blood on his chest (which was a cool moment, notwithstanding all of the disgusting health risks that came along with doing so). Brock finishes things by hocking a giant loogie on Hogan (how many fans would have liked to have done the same to Hogan at one time or another?).

Two short vignettes are then shown revolving around SummerSlam; in the first one, Brock is shown training for SummerSlam by doing pushups above the ground on chairs (one for his legs, then one for each hand), running around with a 180lb. log on his shoulder, and taking ice baths in 35 degree water). The second vignette is a behind-the-scenes preview and post-match of Brock’s SummerSlam match against The Rock. Brock’s parents are shown at the SummerSlam match (they look pretty normal, except that his mom, like mine, has weird painted-on eyebrows, and his dad has a gap-tooth that makes him look like Madonna’s father).

The SummerSlam match between Brock and The Rock, from August 25, 2002, is shown in its entirety, including entrances. There’s an undeniable BIG FEEL to this match (which is why I’m using CAPITAL LETTERS AND EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!)! As The Rock is introduced, he mimics Brock as only The Rock can, imitating Lesnar’s stupid hopping from one-foot to the other while rolling his shoulders (Rock’s imitation was all kinds of awesome!). Shortly after the match begins, it’s pretty clear that the crowd is turning on The Rock, cheering Brock to a hopeful title victory. Meanwhile, Heyman is at his heelish best, kicking and choking out The Rock every chance he gets, and imploring Brock to squeeze the life out of The Rock with a bearhug (Heyman looks like he’s trying not to take a dump the whole time he’s contorting his face).

The Rock locks Brock in a shitty-looking Sharpshooter (I’m not sure why he always did that move when he could never apply it properly). Heyman ends up eating a Rock Bottom on the Spanish Announcer’s Table (like it would happen anywhere else in the Attitude era). Back in the ring, a Rock Bottom is followed by a Brock Bottom. Brock takes The Rock’s head off with a closeline after an attempted People’s Elbow, followed by several counters from a Rock Bottom to an F-5 counter to a Rock Bottom counter to a punchout to another Rock Bottom counter to an F-5 counter/finisher for the pin and Brock’s first World Title. At the time, Brock became the youngest champion in WWE history, until Randy Orton won his first World Title in 2004 (and we all know what happened that year…). If you’re curious, this match is also on the History of the WWE Championship DVD, a review of which can be read here:

The third match on the DVD is the Hell-in-a-Cell match between the Undertaker and Brock, from October 20, 2002 at the No Mercy PPV. The entire match (with entrances) is shown. This match is also available on the Tombstone: History of the Undertaker 3 DVD set and on the Hell-in-a-Cell 3 DVD set. For the record, this is a must see match if you’re a fan of stiff, dramatic wrestling (as is the next match). For whatever it’s worth, Heyman has stated that this is the match he’s been most proud to be associated with in wrestling.

Taker is in his biker gimmick phase, and comes out to the “Dead Man Walking” theme (remember that?) and has a cast on his right hand, due to a “broken hand” suffered at the hands of Brock (when Brock smashed a propane tank into Lesnar’s hand). Brock has a band aid over his head after being busted open by Taker’s cast a few days before this match.

This was truly a brutal Hell-in-a-Cell match. Shortly after the match begins, Lesnar is busted open by a shot from Taker’s cast, and his face is raked against the steel. Taker tosses Lesnar around the cell, while the phenomenal Paul Heyman screams, “Brock, please do something! Brock, get away from him!” Taker answers Heyman’s plea by kicking his foot into the cell wall, hitting Heyman in the face and busting him open.

Lesnar eventually gets the upper hand, and Heyman maniacally yells to Taker, “You’re gonna die now! You’re gonna die now!” Sometimes, it’s the little things like this that bump matches up a peg from being great to being spectacular!

Lesnar deals repeated chair shots to Taker’s cast, followed by Lesnar ripping the cast off of Taker’s hand. In retaliation, Taker kicks Brock into the cage, while Heyman cries, “Brock please…we’re losing…we’re losing!” Taker does a dive over the top rope into the cell, then gets nailed in the face with the steel stairs by Brock, leading to the Undertaker’s sickest blade job ever…I mean, his face is just dripping bright red blood, while Heyman is looking on, laughing. Brock hits Taker a second time with the stairs, which looks 10 times nastier than the first stiff stair-shot.

A top rope arm drag by Brock is followed by a camera shot of blood flowing down Taker’s face onto the mat. At this point, Taker’s black pants have red blood splotches all over them. Brock kicks out of an Undertaker chokeslam, but eats a Last Ride powerbomb for a near fall (he grabs the bottom rope to break-up the three count – explain that one, when this match is no DQ and you can only win by pinfall or submission, and the announcers, Tazz and Michael Cole, previously explained that falls count anywhere). A tombstone attempt by the Undertaker is countered into a tombstone position by Lesnar, who then throws Taker up onto his shoulders for an F-5 and the pin to retain the title (another excellent move-counter-move sequence!).

Moving right along, the next match is from WrestleMania 19, Angle vs. Lesnar, which took place on March 30, 2003. The match is shown (with entrances) in its entirety. This match is also available on the WrestleMania Anthology. As background, shortly after his match with the Undertaker, Brock lost the title to The Big Show (try to say that with a straight face) when Heyman turned on Brock, helping Show win (and handing Brock is first loss in the WWE). In some ways, Brock wasn’t the same without Heyman as his mouthpiece; however, Brock was still da man! Commentator Michael Cole’s voice is horse at the point in the show, so we already know this match will be special…

Brock and his taped ribs walk down the aisle (the ribs are taped due to “weeks of assault” by Angle). This was Brock’s first WrestleMania (as mentioned, his next one would memorably be his last).

There are numerous takedowns to start the match (i.e. – headlocks, leg scissors, single-leg drop-steps, arm drags, etc.). Angle does a great back suplex move, dropping Brock backwards into the turnbuckle corner, so the back of Brock’s head hits the turnbuckle. While executing the move, Michael Cole says, “Angle told me he feels great; he’s lost 7 lbs. from intense training.” (B.S. translation – Angle only took five painkillers/steroid injections this month instead of the regular ten).

Angle performs four continuous German Suplexes on Brock (which were stolen from Chris Benoit), followed by an angle slam counter into an F-5 counter by Brock, followed by an ankle lock counter by Angle (into a half-crab). Kurt follows this up by delivering an AWESOME release German suplex to Brock, with Brock rotating all the way on the suplex to land on his stomach, in a pancake-type suplex landing (and they called Tazz the suplex machine).

Brock kicks out of the angle slam, and then Angle kicks out of the F-5 (I think that’s the first time anyone had ever kicked out of the F-5). Brock eventually gives another F-5, and then looks at the turnbuckle with a sick smile. In a move that incredibly didn’t paralyze him, Brock does an ill-advised top rope shooting star press from approximately ¾ of a ring away from Angle (in all fairness to Brock, Angle probably should have realized how far away Brock was and moved closer – even though he just ate an F-5, the fans would have bought it, as Angle had just kicked out of a previous F-5). Upon my repeated viewings, Brock just didn’t get enough rotation on the move, almost landing vertically (but certainly landing diagonally) on his head. Brock somehow recovers after kicking out of a pin attempt by Angle, to give Angle another F-5 for the win. Brock was one tough son of bitch for being able to finish this match! Post match, Brock is visibly out of it, and you can see a couple of large welts on his forehead, where he landed (not to mention a bloody nose). The men shake hands and hug, in a very heterosexual, non-gay way, after the match.

The last two matches really show why Brock was so special – just about anyone who faced The Big Show would come out looking like crap. The fact that Brock was able to have two entertaining matches against Show is either a miracle, or because of his tremendous charisma and athletic ability.

Lesnar’s first match against The Big Show was a Stretcher Match from Judgment Day, which occurred on May 18, 2003. Cole and Tazz claim that the last stretcher match was Andre the Giant vs. Killer Khan from 17 years ago (aka 1986; if you have to ask, Andre won). This is basically a no disqualification, no countout match, where the winner must place his opponent on a stretcher and move him past a yellow line on the entrance/exit ramp.

The stretcher board is used like a steel chair, as both men continuously swing it at each other. Show, to his credit, takes a nasty bump from the ring apron onto a stretcher on the arena floor, squashing the stretcher. While Rey Mysterio interferes in the match (as retaliation for when Show strapped Rey into a stretcher board prior to this match and swung him against a ring post – yes, that was a wonderful moment), Lesnar ends up driving a fork lift to the ring. Lesnar jumps from the top of the forklift, giving a flying shoulder block to The Big Show. Lesnar gives a pretty crappy looking F-5 to The Big Show, almost like a reverse John Cena F-U/Attitude Adjustment (although Lesnar lifted him with ease, Show lands on his back). Lesnar puts Show on the stretcher board, which is resting on a palate, which is on top of the forklift, and drives the forklift past the yellow line for the win.

The second Show/Lesnar match took place on Smackdown’s June 12, 2003 program. To my utter shock, at one point during the match, The Big Show executes a single leg Boston crab (I didn’t know he had that type of technical “expertise”). Brock gives an impressive looking German suplex. Moments later, Lesnar kicks out of Show’s chokeslam. As a result, Show tries to take Lesnar to the top rope for a super choke slam, but Lesnar fights back, executing one of the most famous top rope superplexes in wrestling history (right up there with Hulk Hogan vs. The Big Bossman from the Saturday Night’s Main Event DVD set, a review of which can be found here:

The ring, ropes and turnbuckles collapse, as the crowd and announcers rightfully go apeshit! The match is a no contest, but with a finish like that, it doesn’t matter. I have no idea how they rigged the ring to collapse, but it was definitely a Holy Shit moment (and I almost mean that literally - you can see and hear the fans chanting “Holy Shit!”) This was arguably the most memorable moment in Smackdown’s history!

Rather than review the entire documentary, I’m going to mention a few thoughts. First of all, can someone please explain to me why the hell the Brooklyn Brawler has to be interviewed on every one of these documentaries? For that matter, why is Bubba Ray Dudley interviewed? Did he ever have a match with Lesnar? More importantly, does anyone give a damn what his fat ass has to say? Anyone? Bueller?...

It’s great to see how many people, like John Cena and Gerald Brisco, say that they think that Brock Lesnar is the future of the company =). However, Kurt Angle prophetically says, and I quote, “I would put him in the ring, in an octagon, in a fight situation, and I don’t think there’s anyone on this planet that could take him.” I think Kurt needs to give me his lottery numbers!

It’s cool that the documentary contains footage from Brock’s high school wrestling matches (my brother Steve and I wrestled in high school, so we can relate to how intense it was; although I never broke a wrestler’s nose like my brother did). Brock wrestled at the University of Minnesota, and in his senior year, won the NCAA title heavyweight title match in double overtime.

Brief footage is show of Brock wrestling Sheldon Benjamin in Ohio Valley Wrestling, which was the WWE’s training ground at the time. Footage is also shown of several dark matches (matches from Monday Night Raw that were untelevised). Tazz suggested that Paul Heyman talk to Brock, as he was a “piece of clay that needed to be molded.” Brock and Heyman hit it off right away, and they still have a great relationship today (Heyman is currently working on Lesnar’s biography).

Brock is introduced to the WWE universe by coming out from the crowd and attacking various wrestlers, giving them the F-5. Heyman gives Brock the nickname “The Next Big Thing,” during one of their first interviews. Of note, shortly after Brock’s debut, he sustained two wicked chairshots from Jeff Hardy that Lesnar took full-on his head, with the second shot knocking Brock out of the ring (he still landed on his feet).

Brock won 2002 King of the Ring Tournament (beating Booker T, Test and RVD). The KOTR win led to his title shot at SummerSlam.

Regarding his feud against the Undertaker, Lesnar is shown taunting Taker’s now ex-wife, Sara (Brock puts his hand on Sara’s “pregnant” belly, saying “Life’s a bitch.”) Their first match was a double-DQ, so they had the aforementioned Hell in a Cell match.

Lesnar won the 2003 Royal Rumble for a title shot against Kurt Angle, leading to the Smackdown match where Lesnar thinks he’s attempting to pin Kurt Angle, but is actually pinning Kurt’s brother, Eric. Kurt ends up switching with Eric and gets a small package on Lesnar for the 3 count.

The Angle-Lesnar WrestleMania 19 match follows. Kurt was awaiting neck surgery following this match, though you wouldn’t know it from the bumps Angle took. As for Brock, per Booker T, he sustained a Grade 3 concussion from the under-rotated shooting star press. Footage is shown of a dazed Brock after the match, before he’s taken to the hospital (Michael PS Hayes said that Brock was throwing up after the match).

I remember reading a wrestling article once where someone said that Brock looked like Scott Steiner’s body with Crash Holly’s head (it’s true…it’s true). My personal thoughts on Brock are that he had a tremendous two years in the ring. Brock definitely could have excelled in wrestling for many years. It wasn’t just that he was pushed to the moon; he had the charisma, the power, speed and wrestling ability that any wannabe wrestler would die to have. Fans resent someone like Bobby Lashley (and at times, Batista) getting pushed because they lack the charisma and wrestling ability that came naturally to Brock.

Whether you’re a fan of Lesnar or not, this is an excellent DVD, highlighting the impact that Lesnar’s all too brief career had on the WWE.

5 out of 5 F-5’s