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Movie Reviews
Action & Adventure Movies
Batman The Dark Knight Rises
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- Written by Jonathan Jacobs
The new Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rises, is an unparalleled action adventure movie. Christian Bale and Christopher Nolan have been joined for the trilogy's finale by Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ann Hathaway and Tom Hardy. Much of The Dark Knight Rises is nothing more than a synthesizer showdown between Bale and Hardy; a contest to find out who has the manlier voice.
The Amazing Spider-Man
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- Written by Jonathan Jacobs
Eat your heart out Tobey Maguire, there is a new movie sheriff in town and his name is Spider-Man. Brit Andrew Garfield has been tapped to revitalize the Spiderman franchise after Hollywood executives deemed the barely half a decade old Maguire film trilogy fit for the dustbin of movie history. They hit the reset button and it is obvious that hundreds of millions of dollars will be the reward for the studios' decision. That begs the question, what is the payoff for casual moviegoers, comic book lovers and superhero purists? Teasers abound, the reward is that The Amazing Spider-Man is a real movie with a terrific plot and some dazzling three dimensional special effects.
4th of July Movies
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- Written by Jonathan Jacobs
This year Hollywood is offering a veritable smorgasbord of films for moviegoers of all races, religions, creeds and colors. Put laconically, there is something for everybody. Historically, July 4th is one of the most lucrative holiday weekends of the year. Typically, the largest summer blockbuster picture is release a day or two before the big holiday. This year, July 4th falls on a Wednesday and although that might on the surface indicate unsustainability of paramount Box Office numbers, The Amazing Spiderman is off to a sizzling start internationally.
Magic Mike
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- Written by Jonathan Jacobs
Magic Mike welcomes theater-going voyeurs to the world of all male revue and Chippendale. Along this joyride peeping Toms are privy to plenty of hulking bodies, penis pump apparati, and behind the scenes glimpses into the lifestyles of male dancers. This is no mere forgettable film folks, it stars three of Hollywood's movie darlings performing maneuvers that are damned near impossible while undressing for millions of gawkers. Welcome to the big leagues Channing Tatum. Matthew McConaughey and Alex Pettyfer, now please put your goddamn clothes back on and never put your asses in my face again. Oh, sorry dear readers, I just relived a moment from last night's movie screening.
Wrath of the Titans 3D Blu Ray
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- Written by Jonathan Jacobs
Wrath of the Titans picks up precisely where Clash of the Titans leaves off. Perhaps the most salient outcome is that Sam Worthington becomes a better actor with each successive performance. It is truly amazing that an Australian actor can convincingly play the role of demigod Perseus while adorning a thick Australian outback accent. Comically, almost none of these hodge-podge actors appear to be Greek in origin and it is highly suspect that they know anything about Greek culture. The level of the actors' cultural acclimatization notwithstanding, Wrath of the Titans is one of the best war epics ever.
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